By Laura Lovejoy
There is no doubt that relationships are hard. No matter how much you have in common you will still have your differences and they can have an epic effect on the relationship. Arguments are inevitable but overcoming those little tiffs in the right way is what is ultimately going to make your relationship stronger. You also need to know when enough is enough and when it’s time to walk away. You shouldn’t live your relationship being upset more than you are happy but knowing whether it’s just a rocky patch or someone showing their true colours, that’s the real issue.
So how should you react after a fallout? Is it okay to treat your partner wrong in an argument and expect everything to be okay once you apologise? No, it’s not. The more you fall into this habit the more likely that person is to walk away. Eventually, they will put their foot down and stand up to you and if you can’t deal with it, then maybe you a should start thinking before you speak. It’s okay to forgive because you can’t move on if you hold grudges but there’s only so many times you can forget, and guys there always will be that one time you push her over the edge and then it’s adios forever.
Men and women are wired differently and to survive you each need to be empathetic towards the other person. Men are notorious for the silent treatment and this drives women mad because all they want to do is talk, after an argument you both need your space and then you need to talk it out. I find talking hard, just as hard as you men, but sometimes it’s all you have to save a relationship and if you think the relationship is worth saving then you won’t only talk but you will listen as well.
There is that age old saying “if you can’t handle my worst, then you don’t deserve my best’, which is true. If your loved one can’t deal with you when you are going through shit or when you have a bad day then it is time to think about what you really want. A relationship is supposed to be about caring for one another, picking each other up when you are feeling down, not throwing a strop because your partner isn’t their normal bubbly self. It’s about being a team. When that team becomes unbalanced and it’s one person doing everything for the other, one person feeling miserable and one person taking the others crap, all the time, then it really is time to walk away. Yes, you think you are in love but really, someone who respects and cares for you wouldn’t treat you like that.
In a relationship there will be difficult times and there will be arguments. There will be times when you are both being totally unreasonable but when arguing becomes a weekly habit and your partner doesn’t put you first anymore, and when you have talked it out but got nowhere, that’s when it is time to do yourself a favour and walk away.