BY Laura Lovejoy
Falling in love with someone is hard, learning about all their annoying habits and still loving them is one thing but then having to learn to love the things that aren’t them but still come with them is even harder – take it from someone who knows better than ANYONE! Over the past few years, my boyfriend’s friends have certainly fallen into that category.
When I met Clint, he was always out with his mates. He spent most nights at the pub with them and he would have walked the earth for any of them – he is a super trusting and generous person. However, the minute that I came into his life a lot of his friends changed and Clint started to see their true colours.
One of Clint’s ‘closest’ friends was so jealous of our relationship that he would go to any length to split us up. This included smashing my house up, shouting at me in the street and telling Clint’s family that I tried it on with him. Anyone that knows me knows just how hilarious that is. He was the first to go. Clint eventually admitted to me that they never really had much of a friendship, they were just drinking buddies and it was more of a habit than anything so he wasn’t that bothered.
The one that hurt Clint the most was one of his oldest friends. I was out with my friends and they were planning on going to bed, Clint was away so I text him saying I was bored and didn’t want to home yet. Clint said why don’t you message my friend and see what he is up to as he is out tonight. Long story cut short, but I asked what he was up to and he suggested we went to a hotel together.
I sent the messages straight to Clint and as you can imagine he was furious. When it all came out, this ‘friend’ had told everyone it was me who instigated it. Bearing in mind that the first time I ever met him, we were in Brixton and he spent the whole night trying to get anyone in a skirt’s mobile number. His girlfriend (who is surprisingly a fairly decent person) even messaged me, claiming that it was my fault and to keep out of her relationship.
Our conclusion was that it was just a plan to split us up, but what kind of friend does something like that?
They were a bad bunch of friends but I had to let Clint come to that conclusion on his own. The assumption is that girls get jealous and bitchy but these ‘men’ have behaved in a way that I only thought happened in Eastenders.
Clint is now in a position where he has genuine friends. Ones that will work with him until 8 pm on Sunday, or drive halfway across the country to help him out. Friends that want what’s best for him and aren’t intent on making him unhappy. He’s still a little too trusting and people sometimes still takes advantage of that but his kind nature is just one of the many things I love about him. Oh, and we have like 0 drama now.
My advice to anyone struggling with their partner’s friends is to have a lot of patience and if your boyfriend really loves you and wants to be with you then he will eventually come to the right conclusion on his own – you can’t force it on to him. Clint still has some friends whose company I don’t enjoy so I steer clear and leave Clint to go out with them on his own but if he really wanted me to I would still make the effort.