Is time apart healthy for your relationship? I’m not talking nights out and holidays without each other, I’m talking actual time apart, not seeing each other, not texting, no contact. Some might even go as far as to call it a break.
A good few months back, Clint and I had some time apart because we started to argue a lot and I just felt like I needed some time on my own to just do me. It wasn’t planned, and it was hard but we needed it.
As any ‘Friends’ fan will know, a break can be hard to define. In my opinion, if you want to have a break to go out and sleep with other people, then you’re probably not meant to be. However, a break from contacting each other doesn’t mean that it has to be the end of your relationship.
Sure, sometimes cracks might begin to show. But spending every living minute with your partner because you’re worried how your relationship might fall apart if you don’t isn’t healthy.
Having a break doesn’t have to come from a bad place either. Just agreeing to spend some time apart with no contact so that you can 1) both miss each other and 2) just do you, is so much better for your relationship than getting sick and tired of the sight of each other. No matter how much you like or love someone, seeing them all the time will naturally drive you up the wall.
When we had time apart, it made me realise how much I miss Clint and how happy I am and the next time we saw each other felt like a first date. It was exciting in a way that you don’t normally experience when you’ve been together for nearly four years.
Things are great between Clint and me at the moment. Sure, we have our little fallings out here and there but that time apart made us both realise what we have. Even if our relationship was the best it has ever been and we were another four years into our relationship, I would still think about having a few days apart without contact.
A couple that is not only comfortable enough to do that but one that trusts each other enough to do that is in my eyes are pretty bloody strong.
Don’t be afraid about taking a little time for yourself, be honest and clear about your feelings and understand that a break doesn’t mean cheating, it doesn’t mean the end of a relationship, it just means taking some time to work on you. No matter how good something is, we all need a break from it from time to time.
Did having time apart fix the things that were bad in our relationship? Not at all. But, it made us realise it was worth fixing.